Birthday, Confession and First Communion

Again my birthday has rolled around, my forty-second; I seem to recall that "42" was alleged in a sci-fi novel to be 'the answer' to life, the universe and everything, which raised the issue of what the question was in the first place! 

Today being Saturday, I had a nice sleep-in after a pleasant eve-of-birthday dinner with family at the local Chinese restaurant last night; then it was off to Confession at Apostles as is my weekly custom… I had hoped to be early enough to be first in line (I believe strongly in being as quick and to the point as possible when confessing), and arrived just before the priest at 10 am, but as it was I was fourth, and didn't get out of the box till twenty past. At least I had time to say Mattins and pray a little more whilst waiting.

Then I had to drive as fast as lawfully allowed to Glengarry, where (at the little country church of St Canice – "in-the-fields", as Fr Allan used to say) I was expected to sing at a special Missa cantata for the First Communion of the daughter of some friends of mine. I was also bringing the Mass booklets for the congregation, the music for the rest of the choir, the altar cards and the altar missal! 

Luckily, after I arrived, I found that Mass wasn't going to start strictly on time after all, so I could relax. However, I did have a near-miss: for when rushing to put the altar cards in place, I leaned the central card against the crucifix as usual, only to have the crucifix fall backwards against the stained-glass window behind the altar, somehow avoiding breaking it, but bending the crucifix (though Fr Suresh was able to bend it back into shape).

The Mass – of St Elizabeth of Hungary, with commemoration of Pope St Pontian – was beautiful: beforehand, we sang Veni Creator Spiritus; we psalm-toned the Propers, chanted the Messe Royale for the Ordinary, and during the Offertory sang Jesu dulcis memoria, after Communion, Ave verum, during the Last Gospel, the simple Salve, and for a recessional, Faber's devout hymn, "Jesus, my Lord, my God, my all". It was good to sing with the choir, since the 2nd M.C. had come up from Hobart, so I didn't have to serve as I usually do. Fr Suresh preached a special sermon about the Blessed Eucharist, especially for our first communicant. Afterward, in the adjoining church hall, we had a delightful celebration.

Of your charity, please pray for Peter, the father of an old friend I met at the First Communion party: I was shocked to learn that he is very ill with cancer.

I drove home along some of the quiet country roads in the district, through patches of bushland interspersed with farmland. Family members had given me a bottle of gin for my birthday, so I had a G&T once I got back, to celebrate. Then, it was time for some gardening, before heading off to the parish Vigil Mass of Christ the King (I sang with the choir, and read the first reading). Somewhat oddly, I then had Mexican for tea. All in all, a happy birthday.

Birthday and Funeral

The nineteenth of November is my birthday; this year, I will keep it by driving to Hobart for the funeral and burial of my old friend Ben.  Having heard that he truly had that which we pray for, a "good death", I am glad to go and mourn in hope, praying that his soul may rest in peace.

Of your charity, please spare a prayer for Ben, an Ave or a Salve or a Requiem; please pray too for Jane his widow, and for their family.  Ben I met late in his life, a long, a good life: as it is, I have known him and Jane for the better part of twenty years, and what a privilege it has been.

The parting of friends is a painful thing.  I think oft of Tolkien's portrayal of this, and of "Bilbo's Last Song", surely J.R.R.'s parting song ere he left this world to pass over to the Father.

Donald Swann's setting of Bilbo's Last Song.

My family and I celebrated my birthday a day early, on Sunday.  Every year passes more quickly; my father lived to 84, my friend Ben to 88; as for myself, today I reach the number of (to misquote the Apostle) forty stripes minus two.  It is strange but sobering to reflect that more than half my life is already over, and with little or nothing to shew for it.

St Philip Neri used to lament his hitherto slack life (!) after recovering from illness, and would say, Now I purpose to set my life in order, now I purpose to make a new start, now, a sinner, to strive for holiness – may I be granted grace to do the same, so numbering my days as to gain true wisdom.

Tempus fugit! All things pass, and all too quickly: let us redeem the time, for we know not how short the time is that may remain.  Remember, O Christian, the Four Last Things: death, judgement, hell, and heaven.  Remember thy last end, and thou shalt never sin. 

Birth-day Prayer

Jeremy Taylor provides this apt prayer to mark my day of birth; to which is subjoined a further:

A Prayer to be said upon our Birth-day, or Day of Baptism.

O blessed and eternal God, I give thee praise and glory for thy great mercy to me in causing me to be born of Christian parents.  Thou didst not allot to me a portion with misbelievers and heathen that have not known thee. Thou didst not suffer me to be strangled at the gate of the womb, but thy hand sustained and brought me to the light of the world, and the illumination of baptism, with thy grace preventing my election, and by an artificial necessity and holy prevention engaging me to the profession and practices of Christianity. Lord, since that, I have broken the promises made in my behalf, and which I confirmed by my after-act; I went back from them by an evil life; and yet thou hast still continued to me life and time of repentance; and didst not cut me off in the beginning of my days, and the progress of my sins. O dearest God, pardon the errors and ignorances, the vices and vanities, of my youth, and the faults of my more forward years, and let me never more stain the whiteness of my baptismal robe; and now that by thy grace I still persist in the purpose of obedience, and do give up my name to Christ, and glory to be a disciple of thy institution, and a servant of Jesus, let me never fail of thy grace; let no root or bitterness spring up and disorder my purposes, nor defile my spirit. O let my years be so many degrees of nearer approach to thee; and forsake me not, O God, in my old age, when I am grey-headed; and when my strength faileth me, be thou my strength and my guide unto death; that I may reckon my years, and apply my heart unto wisdom; and at last, after the spending a holy and a blessed life, I may be brought unto a glorious eternity, through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Then may be added this thanksgiving:

O holy and almighty God, Father of mercies, Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Son of thy love and eternal mercies, I adore and praise and glorify thy infinite and unspeakable love and wisdom, who hast sent thy Son from the bosom of felicities to take upon him our nature and our misery and our guilt, and hast made the Son of God to become the Son of man, that we might become the Sons of God, and partakers of the Divine nature; since thou hast so exalted human nature, be pleased also to sanctify my person, that by a conformity to the humility and laws, and sufferings of my dearest Saviour, I may be united to his Spirit, and be made all one with the most holy Jesus. Amen.

O holy and eternal Jesus, who didst pity mankind lying in his blood, and sin, and misery, and didst choose our sadnesses and sorrows that thou mightest make us to partake of thy felicities; let thine eyes pity me, thy hands support me, thy holy feet tread down all the difficulties in my way to heaven; let me dwell in thy heart, be instructed with thy wisdom, moved by thy affections, choose with thy will, and be clothed with thy righteousness; that, in the day of judgment, I may be found having on thy garments, sealed with thy impression; and that bearing upon every faculty and member the character of my elder brother, I may not be cast out with strangers and unbelievers. Amen.

O holy and ever-blessed Spirit, who didst overshadow the holy Virgin-mother of our Lord, and caused her to conceive by a miraculous and mysterious manner, be pleased to overshadow my soul, and enlighten my spirit, that I may conceive the holy Jesus in my heart, and may bear him in my mind, and may grow up to the fulness of the stature of Christ, to be a perfect man in Christ Jesus. Amen.

To God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, to the eternal Son that was incarnate and born of a virgin, to the Spirit of the Father and the Son be all honour and glory, worship and adoration, now and for ever. Amen.

Mucking Out

I now know how Hercules felt about the Augean stables – I had to get up on a teetering ladder, itself atop a balcony about two storeys in the air, in order to clear out the spouting, full of stinky foul leaves and twigs from the adjacent jacaranda tree.  The down pipe itself was blocked up, and so the spouting had a most putrid odour, no doubt produced by a slimy microbial slurry infesting the watery mess.  There were even two full-grown weeds growing hydroponically!

After scooping out three buckets' worth of slops, I managed at last to get a hose up from the garden below, and blast out the remaining direful detritus, unblocking the downpipe.  All that remained to do was to go down to the drain underneath, unblock that too (providing the garden bed with rich fertiliser indeed, not dissimilar from ordure by smell at least), and then have a good shower and scrub, leaving my clothes in the laundry for a thorough washing.  Only after scrubbing my hands with several different solutions did the appalling whiff of horse-dung finally seem to depart.

This was the sort of unlovely job that Dad always did, but he's far too far gone to do anything anymore.

Earlier to-day, the extended family had all gone out to visit my aged father for his 84th birthday at the nursing home.  Poor Dad! he was hardly able to speak, smile, eat, drink, or even just keep awake.  Parkinsons disease is vile.  Please pray for him in his misery.

For tea to-night I consoled myself with a pot of paté spread on bread.  I think I'll now go grab a beer too...

Much earlier, this morning, I had been at Mass at the Church of the Apostles, and then went to Confession afterwards as is my Saturday custom.  It was nice to hear Mass in honour of Our Lady on Saturday; the celebrant was notably pious, and even used the Roman Canon.  I feel so much better for having also been to Mass yester-day (when I brought along my old Missal, and read the prayers of the Mass of the Stigmata of St Francis).  

Receiving Holy Communion daily is an inestimable blessing, even the greatest benefit I reckon.  I recall one convert explaining that he had read in the Acts of the Apostles that the first Christians met daily for "the breaking of bread", and that he therefore sought out whatsoever church still did so – hence his becoming a Catholic.

Just some random thoughts.

Half-way There

Half-way to heaven or...?

At this hour, exactly thirty-five years ago, I was born into this world. God bless my parents!

On all my sins, God, have mercy; for all the uncountable graces I've been given, glory to God in the highest! Where sin abounded, grace abounded all the more, through Jesus Christ our Lord.

I give particular thanks for His gifts to me of a mind, and of supernatural faith to enlighten it: of granting me strength through faith and knowledge. I ask particularly for forgiveness for making so little use of these gifts, and of wasting them on follies and worse.

Being grounded in faith, having a constant hope, I beg to be granted charity fruitful in meritorious works, lest I fritter away my blessings in anger and selfishness.

I give thanks for the great sacraments of Baptism and Confirmation that have brought me to fight as a Christian, and of the ever-new sacraments of the Blessed Eucharist and of Penance, ever giving life to me and restoring life to me, lifting me up. I give thanks for Holy Church, in whose Communion I find saints and angels to aid me; in whom I find the truths of Holy Faith and the beauty of the Sacred Liturgy to bless me, mediated to me by priests Catholic and good.

"Pray, hope, don't worry": excellent advice I hope to keep.

Of your charity, as the best possible birthday present, pray for me.

The 19th of November

I arose right early this morning (at 5.30!), to go for a brisk three-quarter hour walk around the Cataract Gorge before Mass and work - what a joyful beautiful morning!

I'd already sung in the shower (!) one of my favourite hymns: "Come down, O Love Divine"...

To my further delight, having had the blessings of Nature, the supernatural mysteries of the 7.30 Mass were celebrated at Carmel by Fr Allan, our local Franciscan priest, who is a good devout celebrant and preacher, and to-day turned out to be a feast of a Carmelite: St Raphael Kalinowski, O.C.D., the first male Discalced Carmelite to be canonized since St John of the Cross himself.

It's been such a long time since I went to a weekday OF Mass, I was surprised that there was no Gloria for this saint's day memorial! Fr made use of the second Preface for Saints, and the third Eucharistic Prayer, which I quite like, liberal that I am.

The Propers were greatly affecting, I thought, especially the Collect and Epistle, in my present frame of mind; unfortunately the translation of the orations is particularly bad, and I cannot find the Latin at present, but no matter:

St Raphael Kalinowski of St Joseph, Priest, O.C.D.

19th November

O.C.D. Memorial

Raphael Kalinowski was born to Polish parents in the city of Vilnius in 1835. Following military service, he was condemned in 1864 to ten years of forced labour in Siberia. In 1877 he became a Carmelite and was ordained a priest in 1882. He contributed greatly to the restoration of the Discalced Carmelites in Poland. His life was distinguished by zeal for Church unity and by his unflagging devotion to his ministry as confessor and spiritual director. He died in Wadowice in 1907.

Entrance Antiphon (St Luke 4:18a)

The spirit of the Lord has been given to me, for he has anointed me. He has sent me to bring the good news to the poor; to proclaim liberty to captives.

Opening Prayer

God, you made your Priest Saint Raphael strong in adversity and filled him with a great love in promoting Church unity. Through his prayers make us strong in faith and in love for one another, that we too may generously work together for the unity of all believers in Christ. (We ask this) through our Lord Jesus Christ, your Son, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever.

1st Reading (Philippians 3:8-14)

A reading from the letter of St Paul to the Philippians

I am racing towards the finishing-point to win the prize of God's heavenly call in Christ Jesus.

I believe nothing can happen that will outweigh the supreme advantage of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For him I have accepted the loss of everything, and I look on everything as so much rubbish if only I can have Christ and be given a place in him. I am no longer trying for perfection by my own efforts, the perfection that comes from the Law, but I want only the perfection that comes through faith in Christ, and is from God and based on faith. All I want is to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and to share his sufferings by reproducing the pattern of his death. That is the way I can hope to take my place in the resurrection of the dead. Not that I have become perfect yet: I have not yet won, but I am still running, trying to capture the prize for which Christ Jesus captured me. I can assure you, my brothers, I am far from thinking that I have already won. All I can say is that I forget the past and I strain ahead for what is still to come; I am racing for the finish, for the prize to which God calls us upwards to receive in Christ Jesus.

Responsorial Psalm (Ps 15: 1-2a, 5. 7-8. 11 R/. cf. v5)

R/. You are my inheritance, O Lord.

Preserve me, God, I take refuge in you.

I say to the Lord: 'You are my God'.

O Lord, it is you who are my portion and cup;

it is you yourself who are my prize. R/.

I will bless the Lord who gives me counsel,

who even at night directs my heart.

I keep the Lord ever in my sight:

since he is at my [right] side I shall stand firm. R/.

You will show me the path of life,

the fullness of joy in your presence,

at your right hand happiness for ever. R/.

Gospel Acclamation (St John 15:15b)

Alleluia, Alleluia.

V/. I call you friends, because I have made known to you everything I have learned from my Father.

Alleluia.

Gospel (St John 15:9-17)

A reading from the holy Gospel according to John

I call you friends, because I have made known to you everything I have learned from my Father.

Jesus said to his disciples:

'As the Father has loved me,

so I have loved you.

Remain in my love.

If you keep my commandments

you will remain in my love,

I have told you this

so that my own joy may be in you

and your joy may be complete.

This is my commandment:

love one another,

as I have loved you.

A man can have no greater love

than to lay down his life for his friends.

You are my friends,

if you do what I command you.

I shall not call you servants any more,

because a servant does not know

his master's business;

I call you friends,

becae I have made known to you

everything I have learnt from my Father.

You did not choose me,

no, I chose you;

and I commissioned you

to go out and to bear fruit,

fruit that will last;

and then the Father will give you

anything you ask him in my name.

What I command you

is to love one another'.

Prayer over the Gifts

God of mercy, we offer you this memory [sic; lege memorial sacrifice] of our salvation, to celebrate the feast of Saint Raphael, your Priest. May it be for all of us, a sign of unity, and strengthen your love within us. (Grant this) through Christ our Lord.

Communion Antiphon (St Matthew 20: 28)

The Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.

Prayer after Communion

Lord, our God, may the sacrament we have received strengthen your faithful to be united in their belief. For this Saint Raphael worked untiringly until the moment of death. (We ask this) through Christ our Lord.

Server's Privilege

Pursuant to an earlier post, to-day marked my birthday, and Fr Rowe very kindly offered Mass this afternoon for me; it was decided that it was best (since he'd earlier said Mass of St Elizabeth of Hungary) to say Mass of Pope St Pontian (Mass Si diligis me, from the Common of One or Several Supreme Pontiffs), with commemoration of St Elizabeth and third collect (sub una conclusione) of thanksgiving.

These special orations are instructive, as well as descriptive of the innumerable unmerited graces I have received in my unworthy yet remarkably blessed life:

Deus, cujus misericordiæ non est numerus, et bonitatis infinitus est thesaurus: piissimæ majestati tuae pro collatis donis gratias agimus, tuam semper clementiam exorantes; ut qui petentibus postulata concedis, eosdem non deserens, ad præmia futura disponas.  Per...

(God, of Whose mercy there is no number, and of Whose goodness the treasure is infinite: we give thanks to Thy most kindly Majesty for the gifts , ever beseeching Thy clemency, that Thou who to petitioners grantest things asked for, never deserting the same, prepare them for future rewards.  Through... )

Odorem, Domine, sacrificii hujus cum gratiarum actionibus suscipe, et præsta: ut quos exaudire, et incolumes servare dignatus es, ab omni in posterum adversitate custodias; et in tuo servitio, et amore concrescant.  Per...

(Receive the savour, Lord, of this sacrifice with our thanksgivings, and grant: that those whom Thou hast deigned to hear and to conserve safe, Thou mayest keep henceforth from all adversity, to increase both in Thy service and in Thy love.  Through...)

Deus, qui neminem in te sperantem, nimium affligi permittis, sed pium precibus præstas auditum: pro postulationibus nostris votisque susceptis gratias agimus, te piissime deprecantes; ut per hæc quae sumpsimus, a cunctis eripi mereamur adversis.  Per...

(God, Who permittest no one hoping in Thee to be afflicted overmuch, but grantest a kindly hearing to their prayers; for having received our entreaties and desires we give thanks, humbly praying Thee O most kind, that by These Which we have received, we may deserve to be delivered from all adversities.  Through...)

It was my privilege to serve this Mass, the pleading of the one Sacrifice of Christ made present for the living and the dead, to receive Our Lord in Holy Communion - and afterward to exercise server's privilege - that is, to drink what was left in the wine cruet!  As students of liturgy will know, this is the last trace of the purificatory draught of wine formerly ministered to communicants to as it were wash down the Sacrament; as is still done in the Carmelite Rite, which my old friend Br Peter now daily attends (and so likewise receives this ablutio oris) since his joining the Carmelite Monks of Wyoming.

Having thus had "a little wine for [my] stomach", and before Mass having said Matins and earlier the rest of the Office bar Vespers and Compline, I'll finish them off later and soon enough, once joined by a friend (all the other housemates being away down South, or at least out to-night), will broach a bottle of Tasmanian bubbly - Clover Hill (vintage 2003) - for to celebrate my natal day.

But that's not the end of festivities: to-morrow I'm to have dinner with a dear relative of mine...

Birthday Mass

My birthday approaches, and as a special favour I've tentatively arranged for Fr Rowe to offer an additional, special Mass at the Pro. on Wednesday the 19th at 5.30 pm (I'll serve, as is fitting).

Initially I'd thought that the Mass for any necessity would be a good choice, but having reviewed the texts I find such hilariously inappropriate sentiments as "deliver us from those punishments our sins have deserved" (Collect) and "Forgive us our sins... lest the heathen say, Where is their God?" (Alleluia verse!).  While I do need forgiveness, as do all men at all times, I think to have a penitential Mass would be a strange way to celebrate the anniversary of my birth.

Instead, I now consider the best and most obvious option is a Mass of Thanksgiving.  This in turn raises a further issue, in that such a Mass is marked by the use of the appropriate collect, secret and postcommunion, but these being added (under one conclusion) to the equivalent prayers of a Mass of the Trinity, the Holy Ghost, Our Lady or any saint.  What to choose?

After some consideration, while initially favouring a Votive of the Holy Ghost with prayers of Thanksgiving, I think it best to ask Fr Rowe to celebrate a Votive Mass in honour of St Joshua, my patron saint, adding the Thanksgiving orations as per the rubrics.

Now, St Joshua (while being a bona fide saint, appearing in all martyrologies, old and new, East and West) has no proper Mass, so the texts must be taken from the Common of Confessors not Pontiffs, and there are two Mass formulæ from which to choose, viz. Os justi and Justus ut palma.  While both have admirable contents, I think that in particular the Epistle for the latter (I Cor. iv, 9-14), and also to a lesser extent the Gospel (St Luke xii, 32-34) don't quite suit the life and career of St Joshua, while the lessons appointed for the Mass Os justi fit better, being Ecclus xxxi, 8-11 and St Luke xii, 35-40.  Therefore, I'll suggest to Fr that he use Os justi.

As per the long rubric at the head of the Masses of the Sanctoral Cycle, the text of the Collect must be altered since it will, God willing, be used on the 19th of November, and not on St Joshua's actual feast day of the 1st of September: so annua must be omitted, solemnitate changed to commemoratione, and natalitia replaced by memoriam (note that natalitia is a neuter plural, and so in form could be either nominative or accusative; as I perceive it to be an accusative, it must be changed to memoriam, not memoria):

Deus, qui nos beati Josue Confessoris tui commemoratione lætificas: concede propitius; ut, cujus memoriam colimus, etiam actiones imitemur.

[Deinde, sub una conclusione:]

Deus, cujus misericordiæ...  Per...

(God, Who dost rejoice us by the commemoration of blessed Joshua Thy Confessor: graciously concede, that we may moreover imitate his actions, whose memory we celebrate.  

[And then, under one conclusion:]  

(God, Whose mercy...  Through...)

All this reminds me: please pray also for my sister, whose birthday is to-morrow.

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